Sunday, August 07, 2005

MY SPACE

BulkyBob

My sappy introductory quote: "Live today like there is no tommorrow, but not tommorrow as in the morrow, but never tuesday with her sorrow, and always wednesday with a swallow."

Age: 32 and 3 quarters

Blood type: D positive

Gender: MAN

Description: Fun at a party, rave, or battle rap, 6'2", Brown hair, Beard, mustache

Notable Titles or achievements: Savior of the Internet

Religion: ALL

Piercings: on the palms and in the feet

Orientation: slightly against people from there

Children: Well at the rate I'm going, I'd say at least two dozen by 2010

Direction in life: straight for your mother, through mysterious consumation of course

Smoke and Drink: Blood into Wine, Body into Bread, Nose into straw laden coke

Employment Status: Carpentry/Movie Theater-whats the difference?, founder of the God-like Complex instituteSwear: God, yeah

Do you believe in yourself: Do you believe in God?

Do you have any plants? Yes, palms

Hobbies: He-man, Star Wars, Beverage Tasting, Internet Consumption, Communication,

QUOTES OF THE ALL POWERFUL INTERNET SPACE:

WORDS ARE LIFE, PLEASE REDIRECT YOUR LIFE TO THE PROPER URL, MY SPACE"
  1. " He asked us for help and we lit him on fire" CF
  2. "Instead of a Dark Lord, you would have a queen, not dark but beautiful and terrible as the dawn! Tempestuous as the sea, and stronger than the foundations of the earth! All shall love me and despair!" -on the subject of He-man vs. Sheera
  3. "For twenty-three years I've been dying to tell you what I thought of you! And now... well, being a Christian woman, I can't say it!"- In memory of Dear Aunty Em
  4. There is no escaping the threat of bad saftey and Godzilla if you are a Japanese person in the world today.
  5. On the death of our Box Office, immigrant steel sculpture-making captive, Ellian Godzilles, "Each of us were clearly moved. We gave him a Viking Burial, in his home country's custom, covered in ritual coconut oils, with the finest cardboard and popcorn bag hats and gloves we could make. He was "popped" on a coardboard raft that we set afire in the parking lot. Maybe he made it home, to Dutchland, just maybe"
  6. "Why is LARP so harmful to society? Level Three fireballs. Good luck against that and the Matrix, when they control your future financial investments"
QUIZ: Grades are on a pass/fail, life/death judgement-day basis

http://bulkybob.blogspot.com/2005/02/15-things-i-hate-about-you.html

Music

http://www.bellz.net/TonightICelebrateMyLoveForYou.html


Movies:

PASSION OF THE CHRIST, Mean Girls, Spirit! Stallion of the Cimmaron, Brave Little Toaster, House of a 1000 Corpses, Showgirls.

TV Shows:

Daily prayers from EWTN, The Sapranos, ER, SAVED BY THE BELL


MY PHOTOS TO CREATE AWE TOWARDS ME AND MY WORLD EXPERIENCE:

Photo: Me (far right) and some of my apostles, going on a conversion mission in South America. We brought with us forty bibles, our hearts, souls, and came back stoned with forty pounds of hard narcotics. Our mission was to do it for the nooky. Another succesful voyage!

I have travelled to many foriegn lands, times, planets, states of intoxication, all in search of friends, but no place tops the benefits of my space in terms of friend making abilities. That is why I share my glorious pictures and life with you. Many people travel to different times, but who else can claim a picture of a Tyrano-Don and a powerful volcanoe on their space!

All of life's dramas played out here on my space. Justin Timberlake, from "No Strings Attached" fame, is held hostage and nearly killed.
Smokey and Erin: A few bikers who I used to work with. They park their rockets wherever they want. Never quite got into the black leather phase of things, but they've gotten out of it themselves quite a few times



My home is an enchanted clearing in the woods, where each day I awake to pick a single flower petal and place it on the grave of person to person contact, verified thinking, proper communication, and morality.

MY FRIENDS- ADD YOUR COMMENTS, PLEASE CONSIDER IT



"I've been sensitive about alot of things, I may be the harasser, Askow, but I deserve friends too. I'm not ugly, I'm special inside and also really annoying and inquisitive. So I've told your bosses to let me on this sight, or else! !!!"


"Beunos Nachos Bulky Bob, Its me Gabrier, I've skipped the border and the oceans to find this space on your internet, might I add without a green card. In MY- I mean- our country, unlike the Latin Republic of Indo-Arabia, we now accept everyone. The INS will never take our lives, our country, or freedom, especially if I touch Americano land!!!!"
"Time Travel! Time Travel! Time Travel! holla back at ya, bulky. Piece from me- Dj Remix- hey shout out to Donatello, Shredder, Vampires, and cults. Bulkybob is in da building!!!"
"Hey guys, Its me Delia and Bryler- Your a great friend, Bulky you've been there for me, Bryler, at every polo match,thanks so golly much for inviting us and the rest of the Drinking Gang on your space....... Remember "Freedom isnt free, and we're spending a little more on "it" each day at marquee"




"Hey its me Jimmy Kamikaze, fresh from my drinking party in Denver, just wanna say I'm shipping out tommorrow, helmet and all, and I hoped we could do something special before the crash, you know."




"Yo word up. Hey Bulky, its us Aferny and Allicia"



"Ribbit, Falvonator,
Ribbit"


"I've been stalked by vampires for two years now. I've had to give up everythin I love: Ozzie, the color black...... I'm now in incognito to escape their dark clutches. This website will help me bring back the Tayla I know and love. Help me bulkybob, your my only hope"



"It is I, Coldar Pixangela, Queen of the Fairies.....Fear my wrath and dust. I am currently the she queen of website design and smiting traveller of marquee-dom.





"Its me Taffy, Former Showgirl and Bartender. Ever since we met you've inspired me to be a liscensed performer of marriages, commitment ceremonies, and fortunetelling. Thank so much bulky"







"HA HA! It is ME! The Mystical Don the Gnome of MC. I ride down from the mystical pink fog laden hills of Hart on my magical steed, the Prince of Ponies, to make the real movie magic occur day to day. My home is a giant red and blue mushroom that opens like an automatic garage door opener, and I emerge each morning at 10:17 AM, with a lateness filled with the utmost fashion and glitter, to eighties light pop music and a lazer light show.

Popcorn are my happy tear drops and soda is but spit that I care my beard with! Dippin dots are the crud in my sleepy eyes, Icee is but my blood, cold or hot depending on the nature of your personal request, shaded for my mood of the day, and nachos are my babies from a previous marriage to a young blacktina, named Shabouti......anyways......
Sing birds of marquee, do your dark dance bats, and pay with exact change, accurate billing, stock with correct expiration dates, little or no unclear radio traffic when possible, employees, oh and I love your website Bulky Bob....Away steed, onward Blitzen, fight me dasher, prance with me Prancer.....Ahoy!"

"Toodlely Dee Toodlely Do! Aloha matey! We are Mrs. and Mrs. Nutty Bavarian, invited to the MC by Don the Gnome and the Chelsifier. Have you not ever wondered what in God's name it must be like to be a bavarian and nutty? Well, I Papa Nutty Bavarian, sit around all day and fiddle around, as a nut, often does with oneself. Mama Nutty Bavian glazes my nuts with sugar and molasses, while I play my fiddle and pop a string here and there. Boy are we nutty, and Bavarian too"

"Tweet Tweet, its me, Johnathan Livingston Cazzball"






"Hey its me donny, you havent heard from me in a while,
I've been all wrapped up,
what better way to launch back my sagging career and already faded popularity with the 1-90 year old demographic, male or female, than through this blog. Getting my picture out there will bring much needed publicity for me most recent projects, you may remember me from.....................um..................um....................."

Friend of the Day, In need:


Karl B.

"Fresh out of the slammer, this is the first place I came for some comfort. The ghetto aint all it turned out to be, ya'll mean, man, ssssseriously........I once admired Buckwheat and a young Fiddy, but now.......what remains of me?......Shineup stout fellow! ........What is life? What is pain----- Let me sing you something....

MY Send away for a priceless gift
One not subtle, one not on the list
Send away for a perfect world
One not simply, so absurd
In these times of doing what you're told
You keep these feelings, no one knows
What ever happened to the young man's heart
Swallowed by pain, as he slowly fell apart

And I'm staring down the barrel of a 45,
Swimming through the ashes of another life
No real reason to accept the way things have changed
Staring down the barrel of a 45

PLEASE add me to your friends list.. If I get my picture out there, you just might realize what I was, and could be, to all the little children in the world. Make me happy once again!"

"This space is now under attack by the Pacifier Resistence. Consider yourself written up, for it is I, the Puritan. I am coming for you, so metrosexuals run and hide behind your bad lyrics, whiny and work crippling misunderstandings of yourself, and beware, because your gnome leader will not save you nor will your cheap and campy space on the internet. This is inefficient website use, and too popular. No amount of words can save you from the Puritan, the true puppetmaster!"


"Hey there.....It's me Mr. Satan. Even I dont like him, and I've done as much as I can to make things difficult. Believe me, I dont want the Pacifier Resistence either. Thanks so much for having me here, although I've noticed you mumble and ramble a bit when you write on this, you should fix that. Hell hath no worry like an extreme internet users scornful eye.




The Future of the internet, you'll notice the cable connecting their mouths. We are unable to ascertain whether the cable is roadrunner or the slower connection of dialup. But we can understand that inside their tiny brains are being imprinted visions of internet profiles, blogs, metrosexuality, and sadly the future of bad culture and vice. Are we creating the future of negative internet consumption through our spaces


THE FUTURE?




No comments:

About me and why you should convert towards my ways:

A guiding rant:

Chalked up to arrogance or simple brilliance, I have decided to post a little of your output, from some of my most devoted friends/followers and tards. I, personally, offer their poems and output, since responses to this blog are only open to those best qualified to answer these questions, (ok, Ill admit it, a "blog" isnt an open web discussion forum, it's a discussion group for qualified members on a specific topic, e.g. computers, economics, politics... etc., which is precisely why I chose a blog and not a journal, because frankly I dont want to share my personal life on the internet, and I dont really care what you have to say or think about it, except you Pooky...wink wink), and since registering would mean that you are qualified to talk about the boring, and useless stuff on the internet, like this rant, I feel it is best not to make an example of yourself and be the first one to copy this blog or post here, as few or none have, thereby showing your own stupidity, lack of creativity, lack of understanding of what I have been saying, and ability to waste our time with negative internet consumption, for to join and/or comment would mean we would be laughing at you, instead of me simply doing the pointing and the laughing. And then nobody wins, ok?

Forget all that, because based on my research and your responses, your mind cannot handle large paragraphs, (if you have gotten here or read this extra addition, typical of what I put on this blog) you probably missed some key point or aspect, for your mind tends to skip long things, unfamiliar or big words, commas (which, you, and me, seem to add, but do not understand, how much, they, confuse the sentence,) or gravitates towards colors (that are shiny). But I digress, Here is my blog and here is a living and breathing example of the stupidity out there today.

Good luck at the pictures, I'm watching you and laughing everytime you click.