I ask the penetrating question: Why must we "hit" things; our cellular telephones, to turn on our music, to ask each other for things, our books?
We must ask ourselves: are we fostering intolerance and sexism?
Aren't we merely fostering a male dominated society through such aggression. Violence is clearly supported by such actions.
What kind of message do we send to our kids? Isn't the American dream based on calling with our phones, "nurturing" them, "negotiating" the numbers on the keypad to get the agreed upon number, and "gently" placing your lover phone against your soft ear?
Or should we POUND them, force them to bend to your will.
He who "hits it up" commands the illegal drugs, before he gets arrested.
He who "hits his books" shows those writers what exactly you'll do to them if they don't give you the information, the early morning before the test. And most of all:
He who "hits the cell," rules the world. Literally after it is beaten, you have to power to contact anyone in the world.
For the sake of gender balance, I urge you to stop beating your goods.
They say Warch, Warhead, W-balls, Strange-o-Derange-o, Slickerfist, Hottie, Stein, Vader, Big Boy, Jamal, Ernie-Jamal, Matty Cakes, Dexter, and yes even God, why do you write these pointless away messages/blogs/profiles? Why do you have a personality disorder? What gripe do you have against the internet?
I say, ask me in person.
Wednesday, September 29, 2004
Monday, September 27, 2004
Of all the intelligent developments in the past 1.98 billion years nothing compares to the importance in meaning of the following expressions, developed, and used in a most satisfactory manner by young teens:
lol- wow "ha" or "I am laughing right now sitting and looking at my electronic device" is SO not cool
lmao-I didn't know this was possible. The depths of human expression, truly, are furthered by this jewel.
brb, gtg- easy switch from the lovely and convenient "b" to the personally close "r" and the amazing "g" to the awesome "t" on the keyboard and back. Unbelievable Genius
brt- can you feel the urgency??? So romantic this word is...................................................................................................
.....................................................................................................
.....................................................................................................
.....................................................................................................
k- the omission of the "o" is tres cool
u- the new power of refering to the second person. Ghetto dreams for everyone
b4- great letters such as "b" deserve to paired with numbers such as "four." 4, yes thats what that gorgeous number looks like. When the American language was invented in 1980, I bet they realized that some words had numbers contained in them???? The founding fathers were geniuses.
BTW- there is no better way to let someone know what you are about, to say something more, but with passion.
Vowels (aeiou 123456789) are strangled between puritanical (those "no voting before you are 18" ppl) consonents. Use them lightly. Keep them liberated, balanced between the same consonent, or at the end of your word. For example "U" or "lol"
****Special note: vulgarities such as BYOB insult the reader, saying to them "bring your OWN beer," a hostility for any visiting guest and offensive in normal conversation. Use the common practice "BB," simply "bring beer." The "o" is literally smothered, its your own precious vowel. (There is no American way to express the English "Be Back," the commonality of this word is such that you should not use it in this manner.)
****general rule- lss lettrs is bet, hlps so mch to mini ur con + sve tme on tping. U dnt tlk to ppl anymre in prsn, y wate tme on tping the rght thng. Gr8er rnge of exprssn.
.,':;[]{}?!CAPS- the most repressive parts of our culture they control our lives and their use is insensitive to everyone
do you see how much the youth of the nation have saved us what communicative ability they have spent their time and efforts strenously developing
if you have more of these cultural treasures please comment
fight the english language power!
lol- wow "ha" or "I am laughing right now sitting and looking at my electronic device" is SO not cool
lmao-I didn't know this was possible. The depths of human expression, truly, are furthered by this jewel.
brb, gtg- easy switch from the lovely and convenient "b" to the personally close "r" and the amazing "g" to the awesome "t" on the keyboard and back. Unbelievable Genius
brt- can you feel the urgency??? So romantic this word is...................................................................................................
.....................................................................................................
.....................................................................................................
.....................................................................................................
k- the omission of the "o" is tres cool
u- the new power of refering to the second person. Ghetto dreams for everyone
b4- great letters such as "b" deserve to paired with numbers such as "four." 4, yes thats what that gorgeous number looks like. When the American language was invented in 1980, I bet they realized that some words had numbers contained in them???? The founding fathers were geniuses.
BTW- there is no better way to let someone know what you are about, to say something more, but with passion.
Vowels (aeiou 123456789) are strangled between puritanical (those "no voting before you are 18" ppl) consonents. Use them lightly. Keep them liberated, balanced between the same consonent, or at the end of your word. For example "U" or "lol"
****Special note: vulgarities such as BYOB insult the reader, saying to them "bring your OWN beer," a hostility for any visiting guest and offensive in normal conversation. Use the common practice "BB," simply "bring beer." The "o" is literally smothered, its your own precious vowel. (There is no American way to express the English "Be Back," the commonality of this word is such that you should not use it in this manner.)
****general rule- lss lettrs is bet, hlps so mch to mini ur con + sve tme on tping. U dnt tlk to ppl anymre in prsn, y wate tme on tping the rght thng. Gr8er rnge of exprssn.
.,':;[]{}?!CAPS- the most repressive parts of our culture they control our lives and their use is insensitive to everyone
do you see how much the youth of the nation have saved us what communicative ability they have spent their time and efforts strenously developing
if you have more of these cultural treasures please comment
fight the english language power!
Thursday, September 23, 2004
Shocking Expose on Music
From the Awarding Winning Lecture series, the newly recovered secrets of American Music and Society that the departments dont want you to hear!!!!:
Rick Holland, fine American music teacher, said the following things in all seriousness:
The American Revolution happened between 1732-1776(.......youll note, astute historians or 5th graders, that of course the Declaration of Independence was written in 1776)
-"George Washington got into his chariot, or whatever they rode in back then"
-how many times can Rick play one song? Ever hear of Barbri Allen, we have- eight times (once a class)- in one class- one Babri Allen, "Jesus wept" X4, Chester X5
-"English Lanauge isnt rythmic, not easy to grove to" (rick sings only rhythmic languages other than english)
-"Music appreciation classes play music that is meant for rich white people" (we are in a gen ed.class)
-"my brother is flaming gay" (if you arent offended)
Hey if you missed class today here are my notes on Romanticism and Nationalism: first topic- "The Germans are all about conformity, Americans are all about individualism......Americans were worried about building the country and fighting Indians, not writing music"-verbatim and in this order
"The learned have learned from the commons that they were more different. Rockefellar (the Gov. of NY or the Industrialist) set up the SUNY System. Didnt he have alot of money? Isnt equality in education the ideals of nationalism and romanticism?"-
"very few of you look fundamentally religious"
-"from my uncomfortable lecture on menstraul shows"Rick Holland, American Musicologist
This should provoke some discussion, please respond to these critical issues.
Rick Holland, fine American music teacher, said the following things in all seriousness:
The American Revolution happened between 1732-1776(.......youll note, astute historians or 5th graders, that of course the Declaration of Independence was written in 1776)
-"George Washington got into his chariot, or whatever they rode in back then"
-how many times can Rick play one song? Ever hear of Barbri Allen, we have- eight times (once a class)- in one class- one Babri Allen, "Jesus wept" X4, Chester X5
-"English Lanauge isnt rythmic, not easy to grove to" (rick sings only rhythmic languages other than english)
-"Music appreciation classes play music that is meant for rich white people" (we are in a gen ed.class)
-"my brother is flaming gay" (if you arent offended)
Hey if you missed class today here are my notes on Romanticism and Nationalism: first topic- "The Germans are all about conformity, Americans are all about individualism......Americans were worried about building the country and fighting Indians, not writing music"-verbatim and in this order
"The learned have learned from the commons that they were more different. Rockefellar (the Gov. of NY or the Industrialist) set up the SUNY System. Didnt he have alot of money? Isnt equality in education the ideals of nationalism and romanticism?"-
"very few of you look fundamentally religious"
-"from my uncomfortable lecture on menstraul shows"Rick Holland, American Musicologist
This should provoke some discussion, please respond to these critical issues.
Monday, September 20, 2004
Point of Information
Its official:
W stands for Walker
Walker Texas Ranger
Walker that our child uses
Walker Talker
Anything otherewise would be an historical inaccuracy.
My poetry, "and thoughts about my personal problems, so you all can read, well probably not, unless it has some kind of lie or gossip, or something funny, but I will write it anyways cause I know you are reading this, you know who you are, but chances are that if you are any person reading this you believe that I am specifically refering to you when I write this, but in reality I am really talking about the one thing that makes me most happy, besides dazzling intelligence, monstrous, ahem, talent, an impeccable ability to make many words mean nothing, and an ego to rival those abilities artfully mentioned by myself, but soon you will realize, if you have gotten this far, that bad grammar, poor sentance structure, and my overblown tendancy to ramble has forced you to learn some fatal self doubts that I have in myself, my ability to communicate with regular people and continue this rant towards poetry, which outlets everything I can think of, that in fact my flaws are so worrisome to me that I cannot find but one song to greatly express my paralyzing problems, in my comfortable home, healthy family, reasonable and acceptable standard of living, and lots of loyal and adoring friends, (but besides the fact my 3 mintue time limit for writing this is nearly over), but anyways to summarize all of this i would say to "lets get it started it in here (at the same time HA) lets get it started it in here (doubled by the female vocalists)" by the new great lyricists/musicians of our time"
My poetry:
Gray
low mileage
Nissan
Sentra to my life
by Me
the Anti-Profile
W stands for Walker
Walker Texas Ranger
Walker that our child uses
Walker Talker
Anything otherewise would be an historical inaccuracy.
My poetry, "and thoughts about my personal problems, so you all can read, well probably not, unless it has some kind of lie or gossip, or something funny, but I will write it anyways cause I know you are reading this, you know who you are, but chances are that if you are any person reading this you believe that I am specifically refering to you when I write this, but in reality I am really talking about the one thing that makes me most happy, besides dazzling intelligence, monstrous, ahem, talent, an impeccable ability to make many words mean nothing, and an ego to rival those abilities artfully mentioned by myself, but soon you will realize, if you have gotten this far, that bad grammar, poor sentance structure, and my overblown tendancy to ramble has forced you to learn some fatal self doubts that I have in myself, my ability to communicate with regular people and continue this rant towards poetry, which outlets everything I can think of, that in fact my flaws are so worrisome to me that I cannot find but one song to greatly express my paralyzing problems, in my comfortable home, healthy family, reasonable and acceptable standard of living, and lots of loyal and adoring friends, (but besides the fact my 3 mintue time limit for writing this is nearly over), but anyways to summarize all of this i would say to "lets get it started it in here (at the same time HA) lets get it started it in here (doubled by the female vocalists)" by the new great lyricists/musicians of our time"
My poetry:
Gray
low mileage
Nissan
Sentra to my life
by Me
the Anti-Profile
Friday, September 17, 2004
A compiled list of Movie Theater Fighting Techniques:
-Tagteam: date
-basic attack: punch to the face
-Morphing: Acting like Spank
-Most popular attack: punch to the crotch
-Combo: swipe to the back of the head/swipe with legs to shift the opponent's focus and balance
-preferred weapons : keychain whip, spray bottle of acid, poison in drink, broom swords, Artic Blast Chemical Weapons for Clothes- Blue Radioactive and Red Napalm, metaphorical knives
-God Mode: be like Warch
-Finishing move: ripping the opponents face off
-Tagteam: date
-basic attack: punch to the face
-Morphing: Acting like Spank
-Most popular attack: punch to the crotch
-Combo: swipe to the back of the head/swipe with legs to shift the opponent's focus and balance
-preferred weapons : keychain whip, spray bottle of acid, poison in drink, broom swords, Artic Blast Chemical Weapons for Clothes- Blue Radioactive and Red Napalm, metaphorical knives
-God Mode: be like Warch
-Finishing move: ripping the opponents face off
Thursday, September 16, 2004
Word Processors, especially menus, offer the keys to all your life questions: heres a tasty example:
"Use the Lotus NotesFlow Action menu
Lotus NotesFlow is a set of workflow features that allow transparent interaction between a Lotus Notes database and other programs such as Microsoft Word, Microsoft Excel, and Microsoft PowerPoint.
NotesFlow features can also be used to route forms, send reminders, request and process approvals, and run scheduled batch processes. When Word is participating in NotesFlow, an Action menu appears to the left of the Window menu. The Action menu displays each of the available actions as commands.
The commands available on the Action menu depend on how the Lotus Notes form is designed. When you design a form in Lotus Notes to use the NotesFlow feature, you publish the actions you want to make available in other programs that support NotesFlow.
The Lotus NotesFlow features require Lotus Notes 4.0 or later. For more information about how to use Lotus NotesFlow, refer to your Lotus Notes documentation." (Word 2000) Hope that helped. Now you have a reason to step back from your brink.
Lotus NotesFlow is a set of workflow features that allow transparent interaction between a Lotus Notes database and other programs such as Microsoft Word, Microsoft Excel, and Microsoft PowerPoint.
NotesFlow features can also be used to route forms, send reminders, request and process approvals, and run scheduled batch processes. When Word is participating in NotesFlow, an Action menu appears to the left of the Window menu. The Action menu displays each of the available actions as commands.
The commands available on the Action menu depend on how the Lotus Notes form is designed. When you design a form in Lotus Notes to use the NotesFlow feature, you publish the actions you want to make available in other programs that support NotesFlow.
The Lotus NotesFlow features require Lotus Notes 4.0 or later. For more information about how to use Lotus NotesFlow, refer to your Lotus Notes documentation." (Word 2000) Hope that helped. Now you have a reason to step back from your brink.
-coming soon- more on movie theater fighting techniques
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