Here are some of my notes from work:
Found out during an eating expedition with a sordid group: Pick up lines, a ticket to enter a group's conversation, or outright harassment courtesy of Uno. Try it Chicago Style:
Try it with a Hot Bomber
According to UNO The Proper Response is this:
Drizzle it with Chocolate Sauce!!!!
Go for the Big Size
Set in the 80's Hard Rock Style. Suggested by the Space Balls Melody.
Title: "Tyler, Trackstar"
Lyrics and Stage direction by: Koop-dawg (band "True Hoyts Old-School") and Codine (band "Sangertown Scum")
Performance: in a true Rock Format. Ideally Performed by: Lead vocals: Duet of Metallica and Boy George, choir by Cannibal Corpse, Robbie Shankar, and a surprise guest(s))
opening introduction:
slow drum build up. Soloist Tyler playing Jazz solo on French Horn
Heavy, Loud guitar introduction, pick up the beat.
"Ty-ler, (Track Star)- (parentheses are Chorus (Cannibal Corpse)) firm and physically jogging in place
Heart of the Gold
Runner in life
racer of soul (Pray)- Chorus whispers suggestively, Sitar descends melodically
Sitar, Groove Organ, and bongo extensive refrain, solos (2 min 30 seconds)
Hurdles of Life cant stop him now (NO!) Chorus
cause hes passing the baton of victory (OH)(Clarinet jams with the words)
He's gonna run by you and me (Swuiiiiiiish!)
and place (oh!) place (NO!) place himself in history!
refrain, followed by instrumental
"Ty-ler, (Track Star).......
music becomes more agitated. increased intensity from sitar, Clarinet, and bongos) words are spattered out in a stream of terrible of confusion. Clearly Tyler has a checkered past......)
Ty-lers heard the gun
now hes on the run
Hes passed the drugs (OR DID HE! Sudden high pitched response from R. Shankar)
and got the bugs (can I hear it ladies? Yeah! Female vocalist pretenders from CC)
Hes left us Pert (Copyright)
our enemies' in dirt
Tyler's run to the top was biblical, but there are more than a few Mary Magdelene's along the way.
He freed the slaves (me?)
to get the babes
He stole Aladdin's lamp
and converted the pirate camp (Pray)
He killed the forty thieves
without a rollin up his sleeves (Pray here too!)
and all before the last supper of his track star night!!! OOOOH (spit out and increasingly faster)
refrain, Ty-ler, Trackstar
the choir cooes and the mood of the song turns sad, turning into a Slow rock ballad (Heavy guitar, drums)
But when Steve P came in fortieth place
the tears of sorrow him slain
Tyler took those tears and hurdled them up
And shot-put them out like a hurricane (clarinet, French Horn, bongos, organ go wild)
mood turns Bibilical and resolute
And one time Ty-ler passed for Jesus too (hummmm)
on the Big Blue Whitesboro team
He parted the Proctor and Spartan Sea
and defied evil Herod's decree (Coach)
He walked on water
and killed Harry Potter
with a knife and "magic wand" (Schazam)
(cause with the Bible in hand) he knew just what he'd dooooooo! Oh (Hey)
(choir and Boy George, Harlem boys Choir appears hidden from the stage to join the chant)
its what Jesus would do...hes doing it for you...
its what Jesus would do...hes doing it for you...
all instruments and singers, emphasis on every word
TY-LLLERRRR!!!!! HE WAS BORN TO MAKE TRACK FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(OH!)
final refrain
"Ty-ler, (Track Star)
Heart of the Gold
Runner of life
racer in soul (Pray)-
(thoughts go through the heads of the group as they ramble to the end)
Ty-ler (Trackstar), Ty-ler (bossy, just kidding, lol), Ty-ler (Heart), Cinder(Tyler), ler-Ty (Runner), Ty (Racer), Ty-ler (pray), Ty-ler (pray), Ty-ler (pray), Ty-ler (pray), To-day!!! cuts off with the last word
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About me and why you should convert towards my ways:
A guiding rant:
Chalked up to arrogance or simple brilliance, I have decided to post a little of your output, from some of my most devoted friends/followers and tards. I, personally, offer their poems and output, since responses to this blog are only open to those best qualified to answer these questions, (ok, Ill admit it, a "blog" isnt an open web discussion forum, it's a discussion group for qualified members on a specific topic, e.g. computers, economics, politics... etc., which is precisely why I chose a blog and not a journal, because frankly I dont want to share my personal life on the internet, and I dont really care what you have to say or think about it, except you Pooky...wink wink), and since registering would mean that you are qualified to talk about the boring, and useless stuff on the internet, like this rant, I feel it is best not to make an example of yourself and be the first one to copy this blog or post here, as few or none have, thereby showing your own stupidity, lack of creativity, lack of understanding of what I have been saying, and ability to waste our time with negative internet consumption, for to join and/or comment would mean we would be laughing at you, instead of me simply doing the pointing and the laughing. And then nobody wins, ok?
Forget all that, because based on my research and your responses, your mind cannot handle large paragraphs, (if you have gotten here or read this extra addition, typical of what I put on this blog) you probably missed some key point or aspect, for your mind tends to skip long things, unfamiliar or big words, commas (which, you, and me, seem to add, but do not understand, how much, they, confuse the sentence,) or gravitates towards colors (that are shiny). But I digress, Here is my blog and here is a living and breathing example of the stupidity out there today.
Good luck at the pictures, I'm watching you and laughing everytime you click.
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